Editors Note:


EDITOR'S NOTE: Fresh off a three year managerial stint, your friendly neighborhood lenslinger is back on the street and under heavy deadline. As the numbing effects of his self-imposed containment wear off, vexing reflections and pithy epistles are sure to follow...

Friday, June 20, 2008

Finster's Revenge

So, you want an inside peek at the exciting world of TV News, do ya? Well, YOU CAN'T HANDLE THE TRUTH! If you could, you'd realize that processing news can sometimes be as scintillating as a really good milk route. Speaking of deliveries, check out the scenario below...

Big Baby Fest
Take a cooperative hospital, a room full of news crews and twenty three pounds of newborn bruiser, what do ya get? Global sensation, baby! Well, maybe not global, but judging from the number of lenses at Forsyth Medical Center this morning, news of the Maynard Twins did richochet around this hemisphere. But I'm getting ahead of myself, let's meet the players! With a two year old son who's already crushing walnuts in his armpits, Joey and Erin Maynard knew the twins they were expecting wouldn't be small. But when push came to Cesarean, the two humans who popped out weren't just big, they were EPIC! So much so that obstetricians scoured the internets for proof of a heavier pair. When it became clear the littlest Maynards were larger, longer and heftier than any other set of North Carolina twins in the past century. With that special knowledge in hand, hospital officials did the only sensible thing. They alerted the media.

All of which goes to explain how I and five other photogs came to gather in a hospital conference room Friday morning with the aforementioned Maynards. I popped off the above wide shot while waiting to pin my microphone on Mama - if only to prove just how incredibly tedious ENG can be. (Thats Electronic News Gathering for those of you playing at home - a silly little discipline that requires all sorts of battery-powered gadgets.) Once we go the new Mom all mic'd up however, we warned her not to sneeze and the inquisition began. She and her husband were awful good sports, happy to share their story with the Greater Triad Googoplex and wherever else their electrons may land. I for one did my part: hovering over their new offspring, asking silly questions and dodging dirty looks from their green-eyed toddler. As for the babies themselves, they're awful cute. At 10 pounds, 14 ounces Sean William was still pleasantly devoid of razor stubble. His sister Abbie weighs in at 12 pounds, 3 ounces, but under close inspection I found not one hint of cigar smoke. What a relief!

3 comments:

Duff said...

I answered "no" to the opening question, then skipped down to the comments section to inform you of such. Consider yourself informed.

Duff said...

I later decided to read it anyway. Them's some big babies.

turdpolisher said...

I don't think I weightd 12 pounds till my first birthday! What are they feeding them kids?