Some night shifts you don't forget...

Covering Covid

"We could probably get two packages out of THAT.”

Whatever my assignment editor was trying to milk for two stories in one day was lost on me. Sunk low behind the wheel of my news unit, I shifted in the seat and squinted at my phone, which currently showed a quad-box of bored coworkers. Through the windshield, I could see the big bristling TV station none of us were allowed to enter anymore. Back on the phone’s grimy screen, I caught my own reflection in one of those Brady Brunch boxes. Instinctively, I reached up to scratch my face, then pulled my hand back when I remembered I shouldn’t be touching my face.

Welcome to News: Pandemic Edition

A couple of months ago, I would have told you I’d shot it ALL. Hurricanes, homicides, forest fires, floods, riots, pomp and squalor. Like most folk who read this magazine, I’ve been blessed with the kind of access to intrigue that would have boggled the mind of my seven year old self. I have floated through a sea of dead cattle, backpedaled in front of guilty Senators and sullied the edges of more homicides than I can recall. But I have never covered anything like the Coronavirus.

Who has?

At the local level, we’ve adjusted to the unique demands of a global pandemic in ways that were nothing short of unthinkable just a dozen weeks ago or so. Reporters cobbling together material without ever leaving their apartments. Directors punching shows from the comfort of their couches. Anchors hosting whole newscasts from their backyard. Gotta say, I’ve been white-balancing since the first Bush Administration and I didn’t see ANY of this coming. (Had I, I’d have invested in Zoom!) Now that it’s here, though, what’s left for the photog nation to do but adapt and survive?

Never before have local television photojournalists been so challenged to remain relevant. With social distancing comes the understandable acceptance of app-derived interviews. Couple that loss of camera-play with the proliferation of easily accessed file video and you have a combination of factors that could further take the ‘crew’ out of ‘news crew’. Don’t get me wrong: TV News will get rid of photogs only when you pry the fancycam from my leathery, middle-aged grip. But with MultiMedia-Journalists doing phenomenal work and ad revenue taking a biblical hit, now is not the time for the cranky photog to stage a hunger strike. You want to be a part of this splintering business? Get versatile.

At least that’s the view from where I sit, which lately is the driver’s seat of a Ford Explorer that’s packed to the gills with lights, scrims and all manners of hurricane gear that won’t help me in the least to cover a pandemic. Far more useful is my trusty laptop, a prehistoric model that until recently didn’t see much service. These days, it’s my only portal to a wider audience. But as much as I may have mastered my tools as of late, how exactly I was going to get my storytelling jollies in a sterile environment such as this? How was I going to get past the social distancing and surgical masks to make any memorable television?

The answer didn’t come for another week. A local food bank had organized a give-away and the faces in the morning Zoom meeting wanted me to turn it into television. Grateful not to be assigned another health director’s press conference, I shot my phone a thumbs-up and dropped the transmission into Drive. Minutes later, I arrived on scene. It was just a random vacant lot and even though the cases of fresh fruit and canned goods wouldn’t be handed out for another twenty minutes, cars were already rolling in. A few drivers saw me and my oversized camera and scrunched down behind their steering wheels. I let them be and went to find a food bank official to interview.

An hour later, I leaned against my tripod and watched the line of cars snake through the line, before passing right behind me on the way out of the no longer vacant lot. Occasionally, a driver waved as they drove by, but most averted my camera’s gaze. Reluctantly, I let them pass. As depressed as most of the drivers seemed, it had been a fruitful shoot. After interviewing one of the organizers, I put away my homemade boom pole and pretended to be invisible. The visuals poured forth: a low slung wide shot of tires crunching gravel, a tight frame of bananas before their pulled out of view, a silhouette of a driver’s profile as he patiently waited. Yes, I had everything I needed for my ninety second report.

Everything, except a soundbite from a non-official.

Maybe all the social distancing was getting to me. Whatever it was, I just didn’t have the heart to harass any of the folks as they popped their trunks for a few free groceries. ‘Maybe I can wrap my pictures around that one organizer’s interview, I mean, she WAS pretty good.’ Deep within my frontal lobe, I did the storytelling math and came up with an equation that convinced me I could turn my camera off NOW and still have enough for a pretty tight package.

That’s when I saw her. An elderly woman behind the wheel of a slow rolling sedan. A paper mask covered her mouth, but I could tell by her eyes that she was smiling. I moved in, camera rolling. In a sing-song voice, she gladly told me all about getting an e-mail about the food drive. Then she graced me with the kind of soundbite that told me I was done shooting for the day.

“God has helped me today.”

‘You and me both, lady’, I thought as I lowered the camera.

You and me both.

If you've ever...

If you’ve ever been boxed in between an angry band of masked strangers and a hundred cops in riot gear, you may have had a night like mine.

If you’ve ever cradled your TV camera and stared at the red light as people ran past you like Godzilla was chasing them, you may have had a night like mine.

If you’ve ever tasted tear gas in the back of your throat and instantly flashed back to the last time you tasted that shit, you may have had a night like mine.

If you’ve ever been pulled backwards by the belt loop through an angry crowd as you squinted into a jostling tube, you may have had a night like mine.

If you’ve ever stopped to marvel at what kind of irresponsible person would bring a child to a city-wide protest, you may have had a night like mine.

If you’ve ever ignored seven people screaming at you at once while a loud BEEP in your earpiece told you that the card in your camera was almost full, you may have had a night like mine.

If you’ve ever seen protestors shatter plate glass windows, hurl chunks of concrete at cops and through car windows, you may have had a night like mine.

If you’ve ever tried with your eyes to tell your reporter that his live shot is about to be interrupted by a guy lighting fireworks behind him, you may have had a night like mine.

If you’ve ever squinted into your viewfinder and tried to bring into focus the face of a man who had just fallen thirty feet through a grate in the sidewalk, you may have had a night like mine.

If you’ve ever suffered through an evening of danger and discomfort in the belief that Democracy does indeed die in darkness, only to have some schmuck on Facebook tell you you’re an enemy of the American people, you may have had a night like mine.

Blood and Plunder

I make my living off the evening news

Carry ‘round a camera, everything’s in view

I watch a lot of people lose,

Call it blood and thunder

I coulda been a drifter, but I learned to shoot

Got a lotta pockets, but I don't own a suit

Man I wish I made more loot

Selling blood and thunder

Website's up

Revenue down

Website's up

Revenue down

We got the toothpaste model

Who comes on at five

She can tell you 'bout the virus with a gleam in her eye

Still people will say she lied 

They want blood and thunder

Can we stream the operation?

Is the GoPro set?

Yeah, the kids in digital got a running bet

Keep the drone from getting wet!

We need blood and thunder

Dirty little live shots

Every other crime

We’ll scratch your eyes out for a piece of the pie

Nobody gets out alive

Without blood and thunder

Riot in the streets,
outbreak on a cruise
no matter what we show
they'll say say it's fake news
It all gives me the Blues
Take your blood and thunder.

Website's up

Revenue down

Website's up

Revenue down
Website's up

Revenue down

Website's up

Revenue down


(With apologies to Don Henley.)

A less than polite request...

You there, bashing "the media". Couple things...

1. Blaming "the media" is like hating hurricanes, but constantly harping about "the weather", as in "I was having a great summer until 'the weather' blew my pick-up into a ditch." Technically accurate, but vague enough to make you sound lazy at best, ignorant at worst. Be specific! Words matter! Chances are what got your undies in a bunch was a certain media outlet that had the gall to say something you didn't like. We used to call that 'journalism', but decades of irresponsible cable punditry have sadly sullied the term.

2. If blaming "the media" is the best you got, do us both a favor and scratch me off your friends list. I've been a TV News nerd since 1989 and am extremely comfortable with the content I produce. For the past few weeks, I've put my own health at (minimal) risk while churning out dozens of "feel good" stories for our nightly newscasts. I do it because it's my job and because I still believe in the power of the free press.

You, of course, have every right to disagree with me. Some of my family members do. All I ask is the next time "the media" is on your lips, select a modifier. A simple adjective does wonders to clarify your message. In the meantime, I'm going to keep producing responsible television, knowing that History will be a harsh judge of us all in the time of the Coronavirus. I, for one, am sleeping like a baby.

Rant over. I'll let you get back to blaming the messenger...

WHAT I WONDERED WHILE SITTING IN MY NEWS CAR THIS WEEK...

1. Where the hell am I gonna pee?

2. How much Lysol does it to take to kill that gelatinous mass on my dashboard?

3. What part of social distancing does my reporter NOT understand? All he wants to do is sit in my passenger seat and chew his food ten times louder than every other human on the planet.

4. How many sporks can I hoard before authorities get involved?

5. With producers and editors working from home all week, how long before TV stations bulldoze their newsroom and replace them with more anchor lady dressing rooms?

6. Now that I’m no longer allowed in the building, would it be okay to set up shop in that abandoned Cheesecake Factory?

7. Can the old hippie with THE END IS NEAR sign just do a Skype Interview? Surely, he’s got a cellphone in that macrame fanny pack.

8. Does the ‘work from home’ mandate apply to photogs? Gotta say, not a lot of news goes down in my den.

9. Is this IT? Thirty years of learning to pull nuance from noise only to be excommunicated to the parking lot? Three decades spent sticking a lens into some felon’s face only to be struck down by some invisible germ? Umpteen hurricanes under my belt only to be force-fed granola bars in perfectly good weather?

10. Where the Hell AM I gonna pee?

Hi there!

It’s me, your local TV News çameraman - a small but very important part of "The Media". You know, that constitutionally protected entity so many of you were blaming for stirring up panic over that latest hoax: the Coronavirus. What was that, last weekend? Now it seems even our President is buying into the hoax, er, virus. Crazy, huh? It’s almost as if a global pandemic was closing in on every corner of our country. You’d think that kind of thing would have made the papers…

 Anyhoo, hope you’re taking the proper precautions to keep your family as as safe as possible. All those suits at the podium say the smartest thing to do is to just stay home, maybe monitor a current events broadcast for helpful information. Me, I wouldn’t know. See, while you’re sheltering in place and cursing your least favorite news anchor, I’ll be crisscrossing the region, interviewing experts, FaceTiming victims, shooting video of hopefully empty streets. Crazy as it sounds, I’m no longer allowed in my own newsroom. Instead, I spend my days scrunched in a cramped company car, darting this way and that until I pull over and make my many deadlines through a cranky, overworked laptop.

I’ve covered a lot in my career. Hurricanes, homicides, forest fires, floods and almost everything in between. I’ve floated through a sea of dead cattle, backpedaled in front of guilty Senators and been to more murder scenes that I can possibly ever remember. But I’ve never seen anything like the Coronavirus. And before it’s over, I’ll see it up close. As much as my station tries to protect me, sticking my lens into other people’s business is kinda what I do. It’s what I’ve always done.

See, I believe it matters.

 I believe our nation’s forefathers understood the importance of an independent press so fervently they included it in the FIRST amendment to our Constitution. I believe that Democracy does indeed die in darkness, that no matter what plague envelops our land, our great citizens won’t suffer from too much exposure to the truth. Ahhh, the truth. Never before has it been so slippery, so slight, so subjective. One person’s birthright is another’s abomination, depending on which channel you happen to land on. Pity, that.

But you’re smart. You’ll figure it out. Chances are you’ll have time to mull it over as you huddle with your family and watch your broadcast of choice. Me, I’ll be out in the thickofit. There’s an old journalism saying “News doesn’t happen in the newsroom”. Neither does it go down in my den. No, to tell what may turn out to be the biggest story of anyone’s career, I’ll have to travel to places I really don’t wanna go. But that’s my job, dare I say, my calling. I’m cool with that and I really don’t care if you are. Just do me one favor: In the coming weeks, as information becomes vital, do take care and make sure you’re not getting any virus-survival tips from some enemy of the American people.

 That'd just be embarrassing.