Tuesday, September 23, 2008


I like this old photo of Charles Ewing and me, if only because we look like museum pieces. I can just hear the tour guide now...

Kids and camera
"Now kids. next up is a life-size replica of a once common sight: the video news crew. Believe it or not, simple news footage used to be acquired by more than one person! Teams of two would use bulky recording equipment to pursue all sorts of minutia for their evening newscasts. Can you say 'evening newscast'? Good... Usually clad in colorful logos, these early interlopers would produce feverish dispatches that often featured extended on-camera appearances by the prettier of the pair. It seems strange now, but this form of reportage flourished in the last half of the Twentieth Century, when average citizens only had 500 or so 'Tee-Vee' channels to choose from. Of course everything changed when Saint Albert Gore invented the internet and revolutionized telecommunications. Despite the explosion of electrnic outlets, the tenacious news crew held on for quite some time, far surpassing the decline of American newspapers. Does anyone know what killed the video star? Hmmm? That's right - the live decapitation of Geraldo Rivera by a flying piece of weed-eater string during Hurricane Virgil in 2017. That event went on to become YouTube's most watched video of all time, but eventually soured the viewing public on the idea of narrated news altogether. Which brings me to our next exhibit, the Rosenblum Institute of Fuzzy Coverage. Follow me class - but be careful! The ceilings - and standards - are very low in there..."


Rosenblum said...

Right this way folks, into the Rosenblum Institute.

It's hard for us to believe, but it's true, that once there were only a few news sources. That the whole nation depended on a few self-selected people who controlled all the video we saw. Yes, I know. That's why we call it The Dark Ages.

After the Great Democratization of Video (which the Rosenblum Wing here celebrates) everyone got video cameras and edits and the world as we know it today, where everyone has a voice began.

And not a moment too soon! Why, we nearly had President Palin...yes, that would have been bad.

What's that Tommy? Why is that man in the exhibition carrying a V-8 engine block on his shoulder. That's not an engine block Tommy...that's what was once a video camera. no...really. I swear it was.

turdpolisher said...

damn son, you're on fire!

Miami Fan said...

Great read! You know you've hit close to home when the wanna-be messiah himself jumps in to make more claims of knowledge and future claims about something he continues to this day to fail at.

Another smile delivered to me courtesy of Lenslinger!


peter said...

Mystery surrounds the disappearance of Rosenblum the Magnificient.

The Great Man was seen walking with a group of students down beside the Rosenblum marina. He could be heard pointing out his own yachts , the ambassador's yacht, the Travel channel Yacht. Uncharacteristically one of the students ventured to ask:

"Where are the videojournalists' yachts?"

No-one knows for sure what happened after that, but Michael Rosenblum was never seen again.

Rosenblum said...

Funny you should bring that up.
I am a great fan of Fred Schwed.
In fact, I wrote a blog about it some time ago. Take a read:

As you can see, I am still here, sailing merrily along.

peter said...

yes of course Michael. My bad.

It was just a bad dream

Joel Leonard said...

Can't wait till 2017 to see Geraldo tip over-- perhaps they will put his head in Al Capones vault.

Ran into a bud of yours today-- Patrick says hello and thanks for giving me the job enthusiasm award!

Hey have you heard about the upcoming Great Heads of Statesville Exit Poll?

Believe it or not--They are going to catapult pumpkins with caractures of political candidates painted on each pumpkin. The pumpkins that burst the farthest away win the (exit) poll.

Last election it was 80% accurate. Understand that they are getting the lipstick ready for this batch.

Perhaps you might want to go to this shoot the week of Oct 20th, as I am sure this would provide lots of potential pithy lenslinger content.

Best Wishes