Editors Note:


EDITOR'S NOTE: Fresh off a three year managerial stint, your friendly neighborhood lenslinger is back on the street and under heavy deadline. As the numbing effects of his self-imposed containment wear off, vexing reflections and pithy epistles are sure to follow...

Monday, April 22, 2013

The Walking Dread

Bill and Ted Once we trim those hedges behind The Lenslinger Institute, we're slapping up a statue of the great Stanley Roberts. I figure hippies will hike in from both coasts to take a piss on it and we can charge them a fee to leave with their reefer. But if I was a bleary-eyed Phish fan, I'd stay the hell away from anything that resembled Mr. Roberts. After all, dude eats Trustafarians for breakfast. For as long as anyone in the Viewfinder BLUES break room can remember, this oak tree of a bloke has been boldly exposing 'People Behaving Badly' for KRON in San Francisco. Since that part of Cali appears to be the ass-hat capitol of the world, Stanley works in a target-rich environment. But it can't be easy. Just last week in Berkeley, he ran afoul of two dred-heads who took time from not bathing to protest the presence of Stan's camera.



The resulting clip is kinda quick, but who needs background when you got Otis and Moonbeam?  That's what I've come to call the duo who question Stanley's right to stand on a public sidewalk and point his camera at what was clearly an unemployed dog. This didn't set well with Bill and Ted, Beavis and Butthead Otis and Moonbeam. Having spent the morning rolling in sheepshit, the pair invaded Stanley's personal space, his lens nearly fogging over from the stench of dung-crust and day old Patchouli Oil. If that weren't bad enough, twenty seconds in a third greasenik lost his damn mind and tried to pull Robert's camera from his considerable grip. The effort was unsuccessful.  Stanley kept his camera, got mountains of press over the silly incident and laughed his ass off a few days later when the three - ahem - 'men' were arrested. As for Stanley, he suffered a sprained back and a damaged camera, but it didn't stop the Big Man from expressing himself...

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 "For the record I am fine, outside of a sprained back. I refused to go down without a fight and I used equal force to defend myself, in other words I got my licks in too. Hey I'm from Philly what would you expect?" 

Nothing less, Stanley, nothing less...

5 comments:

Stanley Roberts said...

Welcome Back! loving your writing skills!!

cyndygreen said...

Love you both!!!!

Our Daily Fred said...

Damn! I follow Stanley here on FB so I had heard of the dust-up. You had me laughing out loud here at 6:45 this morning with your description of Otis and Moonbeam.

It's a shame there aren't enough PBB in the Piedmont to sustain a feature like PBB, but I'm thinking you could find a target-rich environment right in the NC legislature if you didn't mind the drive.

Keep up the great writing!

F.

turdpolisher said...

Welcome Back!

Amanda said...

You're back!

(and May Day is coming....aka hippies and anarchists breaking shit and busting heads...keep the finger on the schmuck alert button)