Wednesday, August 13, 2008

The Scrum Thickens...

Crowded Field
Was a time a soft news specialist like myself could wander from story to story with little thought given to the competition. No more. Three network affiliates, a cable news outfit, an aggressive newspaper, two free weeklies and an ever growing squadron of YouTube goobs have made the Greater Piedmont Googolplex a crowded field in which to hunt. For proof, look no further than this recently unearthed photo, in which a half dozen rescue dogs draw the kind of scrum once reserved for a Senatorial visit. Oh well. Short of slicing open a sandbag and pouring it down my competitor's gas tanks (something I've chosen to hold off on), there's probably no way to thin the pack of lenses that now fester around just about any ole pooch with a decent backstory. Thus, I'm forced to pursue my lackadaisical fare with the eyes of a sniper, no longer can I shimmy from gig to gig unconcerned and covered in body glitter. Okay, so that was never a good idea, but can you smell what this dork is cookin'? I can't; the hippy chick with the camcorder went a little nuts with the little patchouli oil and all I can think of are old Blues Travelers lyrics. Now, why was I here?

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

sugar is much more effective than sand.