We now interrupt your train of thought with the following blurbs:
I now wish to become a professional bass fisherman. That epiphany washed over me today as Eric White and I wandered through a gleaming fleet of tricked-out boats, matching pick-ups and logo'd jumpsuits. Sure, I haven't so much as drowned even a plastic worm in more than a decade - but after hangin' with the laid back lureslingers of the Bassmasters American, I'm ready to tap my inner Ahab. Wonder if those ESPN-Outdoors dudes need an extra cameraman - one who really just wants to drive the boat?
Did my former partner and death truck survivor Erik Liljegren recently resign from Fox News Channel? That's how the rumourmongers have it. According to them, the Jersey native traded his correspondent's gig for a chance to open his own video-sharing service. That's big news - as Lilly's news chops are bested only by his savvy business acumen. Already, an army of old coworkers are fantasizing about going to work for him. That includes me, of course, though I'd rather schedule a sit-down with his sister. The one who works in publishing.
"You really should read the local Greensboro blogs - they can tell you alot about what's goin' on..." I nearly bit my tongue in two when I heard an anonymous manager drop this bon mot in the newsroom today. Why? It's pretty much verbatim what I been saying for, oh, TWO FREAKIN' YEARS! Upon swallowing my bile, I fought the urge to jump on my desk and pinpoint the issue with a warbling shriek and spastic hand motions. Instead I hunkered down and marveled how it is possible to chuckle through gritted teeth.
Next time: Something with a theme...